Step Ten and Step Eleven
Step Ten – Continue to take Personal Inventory pg. 84
This step is a continuation of our daily disciplines.
As my friend would say: “A.A. doesn’t get in the way, A.A. is the way.”
People often refer to this step as the daily inventory or the daily spot-check inventory.
The simplest way to describe Step 10 is from pg. 90 of the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions:
“Every time we are disturbed, no matter what the cause, there is something wrong with us.”
~ Bill W.
Good people can’t continue to be jerks once they have been given the gift of sobriety and freedom from bondage.
“If you want to be a good person, do what good people do!”
The idea of promptly admitting when we were wrong points to the development of our own spiritual compass. It means that we have to continually assess our motives and work on changing our behaviors.
We focus on our daily activities and keep our relationship with God uppermost in our mind.
We can no longer continue to act out in our past alcoholic bad behavior.
Now that we are not drinking, we simply cannot think that is enough.
We can’t just admit we are still being an asshole when we do something wrong and expect everyone to forgive us.
Our constant thought of others, how we treat other people, should be uppermost in our minds.
The ‘Give People a Pass’ token game
In the past we have practiced responding to perceived injury and unjust behavior with angst, anger and rage.
We are on a new path now. We need to change our habits.
This is one way to become aware of our unconscious behaviors and begin to practice love, patience, tolerance, and kindness throughout the day.
Start off each day with several small tokens (bingo chips will do) in your pocket. When someone offends you, rather
than get all indignant and “go off” on them, we; “Pause when agitated. Thy will not mine be done.”
Take one of the pass tokens from the pocket and move it to another pocket.
If you are transferring less tokens as time passes; You are winning the game!
Step Eleven – Prayer and Meditation pg. 85
The Nightly Review
“When we retire at night, we constructively review our day…” From pg.86
Many successful people journal every night.
On the next page is a sample of a nightly review. Bill calls it and accurate self-appraisal. When you first get started you may need more room for the explanation than is available on one page, so you might want to get an actual journal. Use this sample or make your own. It doesn’t matter how you do the nightly review; it just matters that you do it every night.
“Success is nothing more than a few simple disciplines, practiced every day.” ~ Jim Rohn
I like to end the nightly review by writing down a few of the wonderful gifts of sobriety I am grateful for each day.
It ends things off on a pleasant note and makes for better sleep.
“My coming to faith did not start with a leap but rather a series of staggers from what seemed like one safe place to another. Like lily pads, round and green, these places summoned and then held me up while I grew. Each prepared me for the next leaf on which I would land, and in this way I moved across the swamp of doubt and fear.” ~ Anne Lamott
Nightly Review From the Big Book
Was I:
1. Resentful Y___ N___
2. Selfish Y___ N___
3. Dishonest Y___ N___
4. Afraid Y___ N___
5. Thinking of myself most of the time Y___ N___
6. Do I owe an apology Y___ N___
If you answer yes to any of these questions explain why;
Was I:
1. Thinking of what I could do for others Y___ N___
2. Kind and loving towards all Y___ N___
3. Have I discussed what should not be kept to myself Y___ N___
4. Have I called my sponsor Y___ N___
If you answer no to any of these questions explain why not;
After making our review ask for God’s forgiveness and inquire what corrective measures should be taken? What could I have done better?
Three things I am grateful for today:
Meditation and Prayer
Try and build up a regular meditation and prayer practice each day.
Along with prayer, if you can meditation at times during the day, so much the better.
In the morning, thinking of the twenty-four hours ahead, consider the plan for the day.
Before beginning; we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives. When facing indecision, or not being able to determine which course to take, we ask God for inspiration, intuitive thought and choice.
There are many great prayers in the Big Book you can use to during the day. You can find most of the prayers from the big book in the ‘Other Stuff’ tab.
“I pray that I be shown, all through the day, what my next step is to be. That I be given whatever I need to take care of any problems, and I pray especially for freedom from self-will.”
I am careful to make no requests for myself only. I may ask for myself only if others will be helped also. For more see the list in the Resources tab.
Look up other prayers in other books that you find helpful.
“Basically, there are two paths you can walk: faith or fear.
It’s impossible to simultaneously trust God and not trust God.”
~ Charles Stanley
And you thought you were done your lifetime of recovery work!
Homework from Session 10
Read; Chapter Eight – To Wives
Chapter Nine – The Family Afterward
Chapter Ten – To Employers
End of Session 10
Step Ten and Step Eleven